Manchester United are now what Arsenal were — a club waiting and waiting for their very own leap forward, yearning for the clocks to stop. They last won the title in 2013, since when seven permanent managers have not provided permanence, with new dawns and fresh starts leading to dusky cul-de-sacs.

Michael Carrick's players stepped onto the pitch at the MKM Stadium surrounded by a frothing sea of orange; every home supporter had a flag to wave with the slogan "One Family. One Dream" emblazoned on it. But some families are dysfunctional, and Manchester United have that aura of doom-loop about them. Whatever they try, square one crooks a finger and beckons.

A cannonball to the stomach

Carrick won more points than any Premier League manager following his return to Old Trafford in January, but that was in a temporary capacity; the first competitive fixture of yet another new era concluded with a rusty old cannonball to the stomach. They were rotten, blindsided by Hull's pace and physicality, by their whipped delivery from the wings.

Hull are not supposed to do this. The numbers said they could not possibly get promoted and plenty of pundits have said they cannot possibly stay up; their beauty as a team is in saying "f*** you" to the numbers and the pundits and to cannot possibly and not supposed to and going for it anyway.

The home crowd delights

Home supporters baited Joe Cole, the former England player, who said on a podcast last week "Hull are gone, man." Of Bruno Fernandes, they sang: "Your teeth are offside." Of Carrick: "You're getting sacked in the morning." When the stadium announcer blared over the tannoy — glee unrestrained — that trains to Manchester had been cancelled, there was a roar followed by a refrain of "Going home in a taxi." Hull are here, man.

At Hull's railway station an hour or so later, a few Manchester United fans scanned the departures board near Philip Larkin's statue. "F***ing Hull, f***ing 2-0, f***ing Hull," said one supporter as he scanned and swayed. Larkin was a master of melancholy. "You can look out of your life like a train and see what you're heading for, but you can't stop the train," he once wrote. Still waiting.

Carrick's calm

No team wants to peak on the first Saturday, but our league loves a narrative and what happens right now sets a tone; Manchester United's is discordant, flat, lethargic. Carrick served up calm and blandishments. "Defeat doesn't mean we always have to shout and scream and come out and create some chaos because of it," he said. "Inside, we're hurting. The boys know we need to get better." These are early moments, but the knack is in the doing.